a short recap. the afterlife.

Maybe too much. Too much fun. Parklife recap:

Convinced myself that I was fat and therefore looked pregnant and therefore my dress must be shaping to my body and making me look even more pregnant to others around me, but maybe it was because my dress was inflatable. I had a alcoholic beverage in my hand and I thought people were staring at me, so I yell at them I’M NOT FUCKING PREGANT STOP JUDGING ME poor randoms. but protecting my inflatable dress at the same time that would in turn make me look even more fake preganant. I should never have eated that candy from the strangers. Adverse reactions. Felt really unwell, had a sip of what turned out to be red bull that tasted like fire, and since it tasted like fire I must have swallowed the fire, and I must have swallowed the fire because I must have eaten the dare chilly that killed person, I was going to die because I ate too much chilly. I was going to fucking die from chilly, but I had eated none. I lived. Danced for 16 hours or more straight, imagined that the beat was a monster that I couldn’t see but I could feel, and he lived in my body, but I couldn’t get him to keep to the music. He just couldn’t keep up by the end. I think it was exhaustion. We ran through the city streets when it ended and it was amazingly surreal to be running through the city streets without giving way to cars. Ran up to C’s apartment, and I ran into a glass door. We broke into a boatyard and was talked out of breaking into a boat, ran up the road to find what may of been people playing frogger. Had to inform them of the Swedish twins and anxiously continued on our way. Got to valley, after a time lapse and thanks to the return of the AM P seemed to loose her happy and b lost her lunch... we sent B home. Bumped awkwardly into school friends and tried to keep the cool and stay out of the judgement. Failed, but found a guy with a trumpet standing on top of a DJ set instead. Best guy. Decided to walk home thanks to the 200 strong cab line but ended up being heavily assaulted by a bunch of assholes. One smacked my arse trying to put his hand up my dress while another went to grab P. We were saved by the kindness of some passing strangers, but i still lost faith in humanity. My legs were made out of heavily condensed air. My legs were made out of led but were as light as air. I forgot how to pee and then my shirt tried to eat me.

The music was bliss. Friday night was bliss, the before, the after, the during, was all bliss. Dizzee, Peaches, Goldfrapp and DJ’s were my favourites. I could live in that day for eternity.

month lost?

Hey bloggy,

Work ate my energy and I was afraid of what not to say. I’ve been doing fun things and spending a lot of time in bed, hum. After a few discovered melt downs and a fear of forcing time to constantly be the bearer of all the emotional dumps decided to finally embark on a MHP. I’m so extremely sceptical, since I’ve dealt with the dreams and soared on the sleep as of late –there’s a valid reason for this, but I’m giving it a go despite the feelings of impending doom.

I’m happier with work, although I fear this will be a “it will be OK when I...” situation like climbing an invisible ladder trying to reach something awesome at the top (like candy) only I hate climbing ladders, and after I exhaust all possible ideas trying to get past the glass ceiling to get to the top realise the candy was not the kind I wanted but I want it in my collection anyway, even though it probably wasn’t worth it. – seriously, I’m enjoying it for the most part.

I wish I could talk to people directly in proportion to how they are: “hey you piece of fucking shit, do your fucking job properly or I’ll slit your throat in your sleep and watch you bleed” I wouldn’t REALLY go gallivanting on a slitting throat rampage, but I would like them to at least pay attention.

Oh them, you fucking asshole.

The migration between the friends group brought a noticeable change in my memories of happenings. Things are still fun, just different.

I’m in the middle of an unexpected scenario – though no clue.

Parklife this weekend and a fresh tax check, I feel financial failure coming on!

I dream of having my own car, I probably wouldn’t feel so trapped and boring. I really miss being close to my Narangba friends. I caught up with some of those guys on Saturday night in a blur of the night with huge pieces of time missing. Short of the long, Oktoberfest, RG’s, Family. Ended up with B on the bathroom floor and waking up semi naked in Jakes bed an hour from home. Shining knight guy collected me in the morning and i spent the entire day complaining of ‘the hangover’ of epic proportions while fun festivities were enjoyed with favorites.